Coping by trying my best to become the type of person that I aspire to be. Quit weed, alcohol, caffeine. Lost 20lbs of fat and put on some muscle. Run 6 days a week, lift 3-4 days a week. Meal prep all my foods and getting into a good routine about those things.
Taught myself Rust and ECS and tried my hand at building a game. Built an Arduino prototype of some hardware a friend wanted to see exist, but ended up not trying to take it further. Built a website to help people play a video game better, it became popular while the game was trending, and made ~3-6k/mo running ads on the site. Went to Burning Man for the first time.
Now I'm kind of out of things that sound fun/purposeful and having a purpose dropped into my lap by working on an ongoing project with an existing team sounds more appealing than it did when I left the work world. So, slowly going back that way and hoping to hold onto all my good vibes and positive habits as I do so.
It's not exactly what I expected to spend three years of unemployment doing. I wish I felt more "accomplished" in how I used my time. But idk. Just kept myself busy with things that sounded meaningful in the moment. Now making money sounds more appealing than having more free time so hopefully jumping back in isn't too much of a shock.
It's been tough. The hardest part about being unemployed is it is very hard to structure your days because work is no longer the thing that is forcing you to get up, get out, go to bed on time, etc. It's also a strange feeling having to spend from your savings/emergency fund without money coming in, you feel bad and guilty for doing so, it's weird.
I'm changing careers. I've always liked teaching, so I'm doing volunteer english teaching while preparing to apply to go back to school in order to get a Masters in Education.
In the mean time, I'm also doing other small things. Learning about AI, going to board game meetups, doing some traveling, overall it's not the most fun part of my life, but I'm treating it as I will look back on this and realize this was necessary.
But emotionally, much better off than last year.
Making ends meet with a return to non-tech after a 3 decade break. Won’t ever stop doing that at least part-time, going forward, for security. For tech, focused on a body of work to create opportunities.
Optimistic.
I'm not coping terribly well. I think what is most distressing is that I am observing a decline in my capacity. I feel mentally sluggish. I frustrate more easily. I tire more easily. Probably most worryingly to me I get spikes of aggression that lead to combative outbursts. I feel less empathetic, even mildly sadistic at times. Very hard to control the envy and the average person I interact with evokes envy.
Everyone in my life tells me I need to get working again (yes thank you it's obvious). Not even for the money, but just to have a purpose and structure and a social life. A common sentiment. But I've come to understand that it is backwards. Employment is secondary, and it follows from having a social network and being embedded in a social context.
Poverty alters your brain in strange ways. For an example I've been thinking about lately, the world is getting very small. I was late for an important appointment. It simply did not occur to me to take a taxi. I just don't do that anymore. It's sort of categorically ruled out as "expensive luxury". Such a difference from a few years ago! Would have ordered the taxi without even thinking.
On the plus side I quit smoking and lost a bunch of weight and I'm physically in the best shape I've ever been.
It definitely hit my self-esteem, as well as 401(k).
I ended up taking a job with Microsoft, but it was a poor fit because I hate the company as well as the product area I was in.
As soon as I could I found another employer that, while not perfect, I'm much happier with.
In a good headspace now, right after the first year was feeling lost on where to go next.
Coping - generally fine - helped by building up a new network of friends and doing things like going clubbing and going to music festivals and giving talks and running voluntary orgs. Just been out for beers with my mentee; he will be giving a talk at a session that I am running tomorrow with the local council.
I dunno, it sucks and its painful. You're constantly worried and people who at first try to support you then get pissed off at you for something you can't really control. I hope you can find your way through it.
I've only managed to get sesonal summer jobs, in 2023 I finished my higer vocational studies as a frontend developer.
The jobmarket is a shitshow here in Sweden now tho, few people are getting hired, companies "can't find" anyone to hire bc they want unicorns and you read about bigger layoffs a few times a month.
All the while our politicians are ruining our welfare..
I'm honestly barely coping. I'm so glad I have my partner (who also struggle to get a job) and two cats.
I'm going to the gym twice a week, bake sometimes, cook daily sleep quite a bit as I'm tired all the time. I'm kind of just trying to stay active and stick to routines.
I've recently started seeing a psychiatrist as well
What complicates things for me is being legally blind. I have enough vision to use a computer, but not much else and so I don't have the breadth of career options available to me that most people do. I need a way back in.
I keep reading, and I keep playing with code like I always have. I'm comfortable with C#, JavaScript and their respective ecosystems. It's like riding a bike. But convincing other people of that, recruiters especially, is proving to be a problem.
As for how I'm coping, I'm very up and down. It's hard not to feel that my career might be over. So when interviews have come up, I'm extremely nervous despite never having that problem in the past where I'd usually interview well.
Somehow, at least for now, I've kept going. Thanks for starting the thread.
I am not stopping until I am a successful entrepreneur. I refuse to go back to a full-time software job. I have had to do some long stints freelancing or agency work to make ends meet. Gotta do what you gotta do.
But I'm not going back or stopping until I make it.
I'm coping by executing a plan that leads to retirement.
Didn't really job-hunt actively and seriously but spent time on self-hosting (which included OSS contributing and keeping skills sharp) and volunteering. Eventually the next one came unexpectedly through an old acquaintance at a party.
I've spent the last two years volunteering a local bike co-op and getting way to into bike building and cycling generally. Additionally, I spend a lot of time doing what I can to help my local trans community (that I am a part of). This work has gifted me with perspectives I would never have seen otherwise, and has really helped my organizational and soft skills.
Tech wise, I only do hobby projects now, and it's really wonderful in some ways. Having the professional experience I do, but the free time to work on projects that I want has helped me learn so much and really push my understanding of all sorts of technology.
When the job market eventually gets better, I will be able to approach it with a confidence that I didn't feel was earned before. That's really my cope lol
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Fwiw
https://elanora.lol/resume resume@elanora.lol
I know it's hard out there (at least where I am) but I have helped a few people get jobs in the last 90 days, so please share the barrier you're facing and maybe someone can help.
Been about eight years, and, after I got over the butthurt of not being hired, I leaned into retirement (I am grateful to have the means).
Best thing that ever happened to me.
Best time of my life honestly, after 15 years of working. I realized I get 0 pleasure from working and have plenty of things to occupy me if I wasn’t. I learned I don’t need a purpose in life. What I really love is running, woodworking, reading, eating, lifting weights, traveling and spending time with my family.
After 4 years at AWS, and ~20 in the industry, I was utterly burnt out, and needed a break. So I took two years off.
But now I'm hitting 2 years and the money is starting to dry up so I need to find work again. I always thought working on this type of project would be a win-win for finding work again, but it hasn't helped much. It may even be a hinderance. Employers/Recruiters don't take it seriously or see it as some exotic work experience. I try to tell them - Distributed Systems...the concepts are the same wherever you go. No dice. I'm on the younger side and have 3 years of professional experience at a payments startup doing backend + devops + AWS. Sometimes I wonder if I screwed myself out of the job market. I'm seen as a Junior Dev with a 2 year work experience gap.
I cope by staying in shape. I have a good routine and I even got into swimming over the past year! I think if it wasn't for these activities I would've fell into despair some time ago.
After recovering, the Swedish employment office pushed me into a program for "job training" saying that it would help me ease into working again after my illness. I was already recovering and feeling well, working out and doing occasional charity work. I wanted to change career and get job market training to become a machinist (where I wouldn't have to be exposed to AI), but was barred from that because of the program.
The company I was assigned to intern at (as an A/V programmer) claimed they wanted to hire me afterwards. It wasn't really what I wanted but I accepted it as a "consolation price" because it was at least (supposed to be) a job. They conspired behind my back to extend the internship period into a full year. First on my last day did they offer to hire me ... except now only if they could get a government handout for doing so — and that handout would be granted only if I had a disability. I told the employment office No when they asked, but they still required me to continue working until the decision was cleared, which took another month and a half. I am not disabled ... so I didn't get hired.
No training, no job, eight month of work with no pay, and been overstressed with new physical outcomes: developed a cold, the shingles and lichen ruber planus (stress-related rash) during the summer.
Does that have any basis in anybody's personal experience?
So that's where I'm at right now. I've spent this time picking up new hobbies (currently 3D modelling, branching out to add some electronics elements right now), programming board game probability aids for fun, learning some university level courses from my partner and teaching her some myself, getting more active (my last month has been the best physical shape I've been in since university).
My personal project list keeps growing, so I have plenty to tackle and "keep me busy". Though I do want to move on from toy personal stuff to more meaty stuff in the near future. Yet, figuring out the exact nature of that is a work in progress currently.
What I did learn, and what should have been obvious, is that the longer you are out of the market, the more they think you are damaged goods.
I was so pissed off by how hard it was to get a job, I decided I would just have to create my own job, which I did. The project I made started earning money (not a lot, but being broke, it felt like a blessing), and I learned sooo many skills (can nearly build a house, and the digital skills are super strong: SEO, marketing, affiliate marketing, dev, community outreach, etc). The project opened a ton of doors for me, though, and I landed some really high-paying contracts and eventually my full-time job, which I've been with for 2.5 years now.
Luckily, during this time, I met some of the friendliest people I've ever known, and they let me stay at one of their properties for $400/month (which was a really horrible property, probably should be demolished (mold, roaches, spiders, rats, floor caving in)). Had it not been for them, I probably would have been homeless. But I now live a mile from the beach, in a pretty nice house, and got married this year.
Still building things, hoping to escape this life of worry, as I'm not wealthy at all and my job doesn't pay a lot. But for me, the best coping mechanism is to just BUILD and go all in on something. Have no shame. Even if you get banned from posting links to your project on HN, haha.
How I coped?
* I helped run a gaming community. I threw myself into the work full time, building up a great gaming server with strong player count. This gave me social connection in an area I couldn’t openly be myself in.
* I minimized expenses, including buying delivery meals (lack of an inspected car) and making one delivery stretch two to three days (~$1.50 a meal back then)
The one regret is I didn’t take my friend up on their help sooner. It meant relocating to a new city, but within two weeks of putting their address on my resume I had found new work. Not stellar work, but good enough to close out my old place, pack up stuff to storage, and move out to the new city.
Definitely take up friends on their offers of help. For resumes especially, borrowing a friend’s address can give you a “local” presence and make you a better candidate. Don’t feel bad taking a career step downward if it saves your ass in the immediate - there will always be opportunities to move up again later.
You’re not alone in this. It sucks, supremely sucks ass, but you’re not a failure just because the market is in a downswing. Don’t beat yourself up over things out of your control.
There is a light at the end of this tunnel. You’ll make it.
Kicking around on a piece of ground in your hometown / Waiting for someone or something to show you the way
At 11 I started writing software, with entrepreneurial aspirations helped by my parents. Over my teen years I must have designed a dozen sites I never published. I did alright in school, but I was never on time. At 18, out of high school, I got my first job. I moved to the city, went to college, and flunked out. I couldn't get up for class on time, I couldn't understand the "basic high school review" math course.
So, at 19 I moved back home, worked a year, and moved back to the city to work as a developer. I applied here and there, there was never much interest. I got comfortable, and although ashamed to sickness, I managed to spend the pandemic years not working at all. I suppose my ego and immaturity "prevented" me from working a regular job.
At 23 I moved back to my home town, to work my 3rd job ever, as a cleaner alongside a bunch of teens. After a year of that, I moved to a new big city, swallowed my pride and immediately got another cleaning job. I hoped to move on from that, maybe to software, maybe some new calling.
A new life circumstance hit me like a truck, and I had a very dark year. Stayed at that minimum wage job. 24, 25, moved back home.
The last year I've been trying to improve, taking online courses, going to the gym, building a piece of software that has real value, as in, can actually make money. But, well, I have a hard time believing anything has much of value. I'm 26 now. Spent most of my year "improving", a small portion working.
I maintain the polite fiction because I don't like people asking me why I do the things I do, I don't really know. I guess I do what's easy. A younger me would've chalked it up to "trauma", "anxiety", "depression", or some DSM-able disorder. An older me doesn't believe that at all. But I barely work, don't drive, and I really isolate myself. This was all quite bad before, but after the "circumstance", the last point is especially true.
I know how to get out of the "not working" cycle, I have to get a job first-and-foremost. But I don't know how to get out of the isolation cycle, it's been getting worse and worse. I try and read up on it, but all the advice is about "making friends". That's not really my issue. I feel like an alien, and most everyone drives me insane. Well, at least I can appreciate Kafka.
(After all that, I've never made a dime on software)
I would recommend everyone hunker down and do what you need to survive, including selling things and moving to lower cost locations and combining assets with family where possible.
Are people who look for jobs asking for too much money? They are not qualified enough and US just has no other way but to go for H-1B workers? It's hard to believe that.
Are companies playing various shenanigans with legal loopholes? I heard recently there was a database someone created of "hidden" jobs these companies post, where nobody would be likely to see them so they can turn around to Uncle Sam and say "oh well, looks like nobody wants to work here, we'll just have to go for H-1Bs".
Taking breaks has been very good for my soul, and I've quieted the fear of instability with surrounding myself with people who I know will be there for me when things get rough.
It's surprising how cheaply you can survive when push comes to shove and you have to make concessions, live with roommates, live in small housing, going to the foodbank or getting on food stamps.
Although, runway is slowly dwindling and am unsure what's next for my future. I'm not too worried, though.
Sadly (?), I don't have any higher education and I'm too "self-employed" for corporate jobs (corporate jobs really, really don't like having someone build their own startup on the side). And on top I'm 26, not 36, so there's no way I'll have the experience required for someone truly "Senior". I get by on German social security, I get exactly 560€ / month and that's it (plus health insurance, 220€). If you wonder how someone can live on that low amount of money, it's because I accidentally inherited a paid-off house and don't need to pay rent (state covers any taxes, would be even more ludicrous if they didn't). So I have very, very few expenses, no liabilities and a few close friends.
I never wanted to be a drain on society (heavily socially punished in Germany), so I try to stay active and use my time for open-source projects. But since my net loss on society is relatively low anyway, I see it as morally justified to develop my "cartographic AI solution" while being a bum on paper. Let's just call it "government-subsidized startup seed funding". At least the thought of "finish your startup or you'll one day die of starvation" does do wonders for my motivation.
If people want to judge me for being on social security, I don't care anymore. I have my goals and I'm not running out of work, technically, despite being "unemployed". I care about building my skills and my startup and having "something for myself" so that I don't get financially torpedoed every few years (2008 crisis, 2015 crisis, Corona 2020, AI bubble 2025, ...). Once the job market gets better or I finish building my startup, I'll be better off. Until then I just have to deal with judging looks. How on earth someone is however supposed to build a stable family life from software engineering if the job market shits itself every few years is beyond me. I guess I lack the firm handshake and smile.
I did buy "Lingua Latina Per Se Illustrata", once I'm done with my programming projects, I'll focus on that. Some of my friends can speak fluent Latin, I gotta catch up. And learning math properly, working out, etc. But yeah, I'm lucky that I don't have many expenses. Stay active, don't waste time.
I was a bit concerned at the time as the previous couple quarters had seen a LOT of tech layoffs and I had also already seen a lot of anxiety in the industry about the changing supply/demand landscape. I ended up getting a new job I was excited about in less than a month, which I was very much not expecting when I began job searching. Unfortunately I may have been too quick to jump into the first thing that came along - after 2 months of onboarding I was out of a job again, as the team lead role I was hired for suddenly didn't have a team to lead and not much use for me without one. Oh well.
I took the holidays off and figured I'd spend some time playing with all the emerging AI capabilities. I figured I'd hack on some fun stuff for a few months, see if I could build a product business around it, and go from there. I ended up building something along the lines of Windows Recall, but when Microsoft announced it in May 24 and I saw the reception, that was the end of that.
I started job searching again, but then my wife got diagnosed with cancer and I decided to extend my time off to focus on her treatment. Fortunately treatment went about as well as we could hope and this summer she went back to work again.
So I've been applying again over the last few months. Initially I focused on local jobs as I've been mostly remote since 2018 and frankly miss the office environment. I got 3 final round interviews in the first month of applying and got ghosted by all 3. That was unexpected and frustrating. And for one job, in my last interview round with a VP, he said he wanted me to come back in a few weeks to interview for a more senior role instead. Which I did, and then they ghosted me. I don't necessarily mind not getting the job (I'm awesome but hey I get there might be better fits out there for particular role requirements) but I don't get the unprofessionalism that has seemingly become so common these days.
Now I'm starting to focus on remote jobs again as well, but it's tough constantly seeing day old job posts on linkedin with 100+ applications already.
So as for coping, I'm doing alright all things considered. Definitely didn't expect to go this long without a 9-5, and I know I'm fortunate to have been able to absorb it financially. Most importantly, I'm grateful that I spent the last year+ making sure my wife was taken care of. And of course that experience really puts into perspective the importance of how we spend our days, while we still have them. I will say that I'm disappointed (with myself) I haven't been able to launch a viable business during this time, but that's how it goes sometimes. I'm looking forward to 2026.
I saw this coming for a long time and kept my lifestyle simple and expenses low so that I'd be able to retire early. I'm happy to work again if I can find something reasonable but I'm not going to kill myself anymore faking my way through some "agile" AI/ad-tech company job.
Working on self-improvement: excercise, eat/sleep well, defeat phone addiction, become social. I enjoy drugs once a week. I travel all year in some beautiful places. Spend ~2 hours every day trying to find a wife.
In general, I get very few replies, even fewer interviews and 100% eventually "freeze the position" or simply ghost me. I've heard that too many companies are currently spending their HR budgets in market research and have no intention of fulfilling most of the positions they advertise. Not sure if that's true, and maybe there are other reasons for that, market-related and/or related to my resume, but applying to jobs is feeling just a huge waste of my time currently and I'm tending to apply only when I see a great fit.
How I cope: I could save a fair amount of money during the startup frenzy in the course of the pandemics and am living off it right now. But it doesn't generate enough passive income, not even close, so I'll have to find a job eventually. I'm seriously considering another profession. Maybe trying to ingress in the education field with my masters. Despite tech job market being at the rock-bottom, the unemployment rates in Brazil are at a historic low.
Now, despite this gloomy report, if you ask me, I'm feeling optimistic, happy even. I'm really seizing the opportunity to study a lot and spending time with my family, so I feel all this is doing me well overall.
Doing my own projects
It’s much harder than just going to a company and clock in 9-5
But still will continue on sending out proper CV.
It's hard to remember beyond vignettes, but around when I left my last regular job it felt like my world was collapsing. I'd drifted out of a relationship, I was struggling with mental health just as my physical health was improving, my social and political environment started feeling uncomfortable, the small startup I worked for was struggling to pay me (at all, let alone on time), and Mom's illness was becoming terminal (eventually I lost Dad too) and I moved back home to help look after her.
Even before that my employment record had been kinda spotty but I was blessed to have a supportive family and very frugal habits that let me start building up some savings. But I also definitely counted some unhatched chickens. At first, putting the world of employment completely out of my mind was part of how I coped with the stress. Then I started deluding myself that I was "semi-retired". By the time reality fully hit me, the self-doubt from the existing gap in my resume was self-reinforcing. And my "professional network" feels like a joke now.
I'm trying to shake myself out of it, force myself to build a portfolio and go looking again. It's brutal, though. Hard to even find the words for this post, and read them back and wonder what I'm doing with/to myself. And the world is different, too. Even without thinking about AI. I have deep expertise in some tech stuff but no obvious way to show it off (of course I want to write good code rather than clever code). I don't want to do all this new "web 2.0" (is it 3.0 now?) stuff. It looks and feels awful to me, on every level. I just want to make simple, practical, really well designed tools (it was strangely hard to phrase that).
I would say even before this all went down things were going badly for me. I had lost my passion for tech for a long time and wondered if that would ever come back... Well, after spending an entire year not coding anything I woke up one day... and felt excited again?
I think that maybe I just had burn out and had never taken a proper break in my life. Makes me realize that a lot of the way I operated was unsustainable... And if its going to end up in me being severely mentally broken to protect myself from stress that I'm self-inducing... its not worth it. Proper rest is the essential piece I never took seriously.
I don't know if I'll end up being hired again and I don't really care. I'm currently working on my open source projects and having a lot of fun. Feels good man.
Moved to bay area a few weeks despite the cost, both bc i want to be here, but also hoping that maybe some in-person networking pays off and i can find something. i'd honestly be happy being an office manager, i don't need a high paying dev job. but even stuff like office manager requires 5+ years experience doing that.
After my last client 2 years ago, I got into reading/listening to philosophy, which eventually led to a steady contemplative practice. 3 months into it, it became difficult to motivate myself to do anything except listen to guided meditations, satsangs by various teachers, contemplate into the sense of self, or go on daily long walks across town doing the same.
A year ago, some motivation came back, which allowed me to do a few coding problems every day. Then about 5 months ago, I started to let go of some personal attachments (identity patterns, beliefs about me, about life, about the world, about my place in it) and motivation started to steadily come back in, but with a lot of detachment. 3 months ago I started prepping to find a job again. I bought a few books and joined a few online courses to fill the gaps in my resume. I've accepted that I may need to get back on the horse at half my previous salary. I think I would be fine with even a third and probably less, if it didn't look so suspicious to my would-be employer, lol. I have an unwavering trust that things will work themselves out just fine, so even when I experience bouts of stress, they're quite brief.
I have some short term goals, but little ambitions. I can still see the achiever in me, but he's slowly dying. I'm fine with that. I'm trying to be fine with how the world is generally. If I feel that I can help make things easier for someone right now, I can try. But I've accepted that I'm no messiah. There are no messiah. Nobody knows shit about how this or that ought to be. Now or in the future. I'm coming to peace with success really meaning experiencing breath or taking a step.
Lately, I've started adding some of the new skills that I acquired in my resume and it correlated with some reactions on my latest applications. Causation? Maybe, I don't know, but there's hope. One thing that will probably change even after I find work, is that I'll execute on my other interests, which I kept putting off, because of some far away grandiose objectives. My recent struggles with money and employment in tech have also revealed a vulnerability and a dependency. I see that I need to be more resilient and adaptable. Next time the industry comes up with new interesting shenanigans to test me, I'll probably be moving on to something else. Beekeeping, fungiculture, soap making, or whatever. I'll probably even start a few projects on the side while employed. I love coding and will probably keep doing it until my mind wavers, but it has to stop being my identity.
Once I was lucky enough to get a miserable job I could began from the ground up all over again. It hasn't been easy but as the time passed felt like I was regaining my inner peace and as I see it now that is the source of happiness. Not everything is perfect but in 2016-2017 I couldn't even imagine I would escape that situation.
Am a bit scared because the project I'm working on is reaching its final stages so I can be completely unemployed anytime soon once again, but at least this time I'm prepared for it and am doing much better than 10 years ago.
I wish nobody ever has to go through a situation like this. Hoping you all are doing great.
I spent much of that year on personal projects and family before I could seriously commit myself. Then covid happened.
It took 2.5yr before I worked again, in FAANG. There were many moments of feeling down and alone.
I'm unemployed again, 3 months now, this time after being laid off. I wish I could just concentrate my efforts on developing products and monetizing them. But since I have a family to support, I decided to spend time on these projects only to reward myself for grinding leetcode & system design.
I was very burnt out after being fired / laid off from multiple unethical tech startups and a divorce.
During the ego death I realized that I no longer had any desire to do work that wasn't making the world a better place. I considered changing careers because it's very hard to find software jobs in that space but I kept searching. I remained sane by reminding myself that suffering is temporary and the world is still beautiful in many ways.
I got hired by a local community college to work on some very hard software problems and I couldn't be happier. I get to continue working with the stuff I love while helping people achieve upward mobility.
When I say I have not worked since, I am only referring to taxable income. Helping my mom put down mulch for her flower garden didn't require a W-2 or I-9 but I still was paid. That's mostly how I have been getting by, odd jobs for family members and friends, with a bit of reselling junk I find on the street as art.
I also live in a very low cost of living area and am very fortunate that my landlord has never increased my rent. My rent is considered shockingly low, even for this poverty dense area. I am by nature very frugal, to extremes at times, like with clothing (all from a thrift store, frequently repaired myself with needle and thread) and furniture from the side of the road.
I always wanted to work in tech. College did not work out for me (I've tried 5 times at 3 different schools) thanks in part to ADHD/bipolar/autism/whatever they call it now, with the closest I've come being a job at a call center. At this point I'm too old for food service and was never good at it anyways, too old and not strong enough for local manufacturing jobs and there are not many opportunities around me for anything else.
I keep a spreadsheet of applications I've turned in and the results of followups. There are just shy of 400 entries currently, most never get a callback or any progress from followups. I've landed 6 interviews in that time, none worked out. It's been close to a year since I added a new entry, I've pretty much given up. I'll call it retirement for a laugh but I'm only 43.
The first few months I spent trying to make my own work, since my tech background is great, but really, that led to nowhere, especially in this economy (Canada), so I started looking for a job. Now 1.5 years of active searching and only 4 interviews, yes, only 4 where the job description was as if it was written to match my resume, yet I got rejected, just to see how bad it is, compared to before until 2021. I used to get contacted for jobs, some were in big companies like Amazon for 180k. All other applications just go to the void, or cliché "we went with another candidate" but the posting remains open 3 months later. Sometimes I would receive the rejection two hours after applying after midnight, so it's just automated.
It's been tough, mentally demoralizing and I borderline went suicidal at some point. Even now, if some burglar came to shoot me in the face I wouldn't even flinch, completely hopeless, not because of not finding a job, but because of 15+ years of education and experience and you are just invisible, no matter how you perfect the resume or whatever. Meanwhile I see fresh co-op students are hired in good companies and good positions, mostly girls too, making me believe that HR (mostly women) and managers (mostly men) prefer hiring fresh especially women for all sorts of reasons, and also company-wise too because they can pay them peanuts without an issue. I deeply regret becoming an engineer, waste of time and money. If I had invested that in other education or even becoming a plumber I would be in a better position now.
The plan right now is to find anything, work and save a little then completely change my career, no more engineering or tech stuff despite my passion in this field, but if it doesn't pay bills, it's becoming like an art degree now, especially when the industry doesn't have any measure to protect the profession. Anyone can be an engineer, meanwhile I see a nurse (which seen as the janitor of healthcare jobs) is paid ~90k on par with a senior engineer, if you found the job anyway. You know something is not right, hell, even a landscaper makes better than that. Leaving Canada isn't an option right now due to some reasons.
I've gone through my network multiple times, asked for referrals, have applied to 2,000+ job openings that I've seen on LinkedIn, have tried networking meetings, you name it. I'm in NYC and not geographically mobile (raising 2 kids, divorced), but I've applied to jobs in FL, Chicago, etc where I would try to make it work being in an office part time around my schedule. I've applied to totally different sectors.
The recruiting merry-go-around is brutal. ATS to enter resume data, automatic rejection emails (sometimes within under 24h!). The "what have you done the last two years" question kills me -- I've looked for a job, that's what I've done.
I'm now doing temp office work for my local government. I actually prefer the job setting, aside from the low pay. I would encourage everyone to try getting work in their own local governments, especially around big events like elections, when there's need for a lot of people at once.
Isolation and poverty of unemployment was only exacerbated by dealing with dumb team dynamics.
Doing okay. Building my friendships.
Two years is well past the point of having to throw the kitchen sink at the problem. Months in, it's worth having projects in some key technologies. A year in, I'd re-train. I'd also scout out some grants for school/training available to those who've been laid off.
It had me thinking of what I want to impart to my children. I don't want to strike the fear of God in them that you're always on the precipice of doom, but I don't want them complacent either. Robotics x machine-learning/LLMs presents a lot of uncertainty.
I ended up having to come back to the bay area prematurely. I want to live here long term but it wasn't the right fit for where I'm at in life. (Single mid-30s male - dying alone) I'm working at a FAANG. I've studied well over 1000+ LC problems, paid for professional tutoring/mocks in LC and System Design, dozens of free mock interviews, and several hundred actual interviews over the years.
The way I coped was working even harder at studying and having an otherwise busy life in other aspects. When I looked for jobs in the past - it was a full-time job just from the studying aspect.
It’s free beyond the cost of the book (which you can probably find in your public library) and has helped thousands.
Good luck!
I just do some preparation walk into the building and announce i want to work there. You dont even have to pay me. Ik im still heren by the end of the month we talk. Stop thinking about it, we have work to do!
This is not a great formula but it is a great filter for the kind of company I want to work for. If it cant detect a good deal im out.
I was always made to feel fundamentally broken, and I wondered if I was really that terrible. I had no clue why I was treated with such malice and made to feel so unwanted.
Adding my story to the hat - graduated in 2022, naively thinking the world was eager for new contributors, and having finished my degree, I could start working on interesting real-world problems right away. Instead, I got nowhere and spiraled into the most severe self-doubt, worthlessness, and depression in my 20-something years of life.
I had the opportunity to learn and contribute through volunteering, joining my first organization in 2023. Used to be a full-time thing, even what one may consider overtime. Now, I'm kinda spread thin with projects, and also done everything important to where the projects are in maintenance mode.
But finally having that proof - that I could learn, contribute, and do well. I think it was life-changing. Yet judgement and imposter syndrome still hits like - "well, you didn't get paid, so it doesn't mean anything. That's not real work experience." Heard that's basically what someone said about my CV.
Did a smaller project across 3 months, then joined a third org in 2024. Obviously, not pulling 40+ volunteer hours a week anymore, but I still do what I can. Big progress through small changes, doing more in less time, and all that.
I got to work on these projects, learn a few lessons, and I can now bring my ideas to life using what I know. It's relieving to have some control over my endeavors finally. I don't really need a tech job anymore, because I've gained the insight I once thought I could only get from having one.
Technically, I'm employed, but it's on the retail floor. Though I was unemployed for 27 months beforehand, over 3 years without starting what I once thought would be my career. And I'm about to be on the search again.
I think more physical jobs are catching my interest. I'm just focused on seeking novel experiences and further knowledge to broaden my horizons.
Key factors was that I had many learning/projects I wanted to do and now I had time to do it, so I did. And lowering spending. Since I moved home to my parent and I didn't buy anything above barely necessity, my spending dropped drastically. 2 months normal expenditure would last 8 months. I could've been unemployed for probably 3 years without financial stress.
I worked in a niche field so finding relevant job was hard. I had to look globally, and would get to final stage of interview several times but always fail at that. That kinda hurt and activated impostor syndromes. Passing Meta interview did help with that (although they ghosted me after passing the final interview)
In the end I got a job that I don't even remember that I applied to, but turned out to be doing completely different things than what they were looking for. It have mostly been due to luck: my niche have some clout now given err... Current political climate
It sure would be nice if one of those bitcoin millionaires came out of nowhere willing to sponsor me. I'd love to focus on open source, without worrying about making rent or eating this month.
Shameless self-promotion, sorry..
On the plus side, were trying to be very scientific about our approach, and have been hosting sessions every morning where we apply for 2-3 jobs documenting the entire process and sharing encouragement and hoping to avoid burnout.
I've been thinking of opening this job hunting session to more people so we can start collecting some really good data on exactly how hard it is to get a job, and maybe help get a better understanding of what strategies are most effective when looking for a job. If you're interested I'm collecting some feedback here: https://forms.office.com/r/kKk7e6Wvre
Good luck out there.
(1) Big issue, barriers to entry: In the US, for plumbers, electricians, lawn maintainers, ..., they get little competition, i.e., no supply from more than, say, 100 miles away and, thus, none from Asia or Europe.
E.g., a guy down the street was injured so needed someone to mow his grass. My older brother had the job, was too busy with college, so I got the job. They kept asking me to accept a higher fee, but I was afraid I didn't deserve it and didn't want to disappoint my customer. The guy had a next door neighbor who called me to weed their garden. Another guy had an overgrown hedge and called me to cut it back. Another customer had a hedge about 3' high and for neighborhood status wanted it cut to a perfect box and asked me .... Didn't realize that customers were calling ME -- in business, a dream situation, but at 16 didn't appreciate that.
Instead, could have gotten some books on Horticulture 101. With a little marketing, e.g., business cards, a sign could display when working on a yard, a professional look, have the neighbors compete for the best looking yards and proud to be paying my high fees for status, .... Work by "Appointment Only", and maybe by the season only. In a few weeks could have made money enough for a year of college tuition, but college, already had a better career than college offered.
(2) In the US, during the Cold War and the beginning of computing, at least around DC, employers were desperate for anyone with talent, interest, and any experience at all in computing, demand was much greater than supply, and for a job just look in The Washington Post, ..., and have a job in a week.
(3) Still in the US, by the 1990s, some big companies would fire half their computing experts, then could send 1000 resumes and go for years without a job -- could wish could swap AI expertise, background in teaching computer science in college, relevant Bachelor's, Master's and Ph.D. degrees for a slot as an apprentice plumber -- literally, no exaggeration.
Evidence: For a career, a Ph.D., publications in AI, etc. can be worse than a felony conviction. Literally.
If 1000 resumes and more than a year looking for a job, then conclude no fish in that lake and need to look elsewhere.
But college is MUCH better than grass mowing? In the US, not necessarily!
Lesson: Start a business, maybe even one exploiting some aspects of computing and even with some barriers to entry or plumbing, grass mowing, ....
No joke, folks.