The tax system says that's too bad, parents pay what children break.
I'm wondering how various countries handle it, I'm hoping to find examples where I can say hey look this country has the understanding of statistics and that if you're paying much more than other people because your child has a problem that you should be able to deduct that.
In this case you are entitled to https://www.kela.fi/child-home-care-allowance
In addition to: https://www.kela.fi/child-benefit
And maybe this too: https://www.kela.fi/disability-allowance-for-children
New Zealand has socialised health care and socialised benefits, so there is a variable amount of government help or government money. But I'm fairly sure it is most often below what you would need. Some high needs kids might get more help.
I do know of parents that have moved to countries that have better socialised healthcare. It's a radical move but perhaps worth considering depending on your circumstances.
> breaks significantly more things
Use thrift stores, especially ones that give deep discounts for needy parents. No government will help you buy nicer things.